Dad Jokes

2020-06-28 06:26:23 Why don't you want to be sad at a retail store?
You'd be at the lowest of Lowe's

Submitted by Cresendo77

@DadJokesCompilation Aprire / Come

2020-06-28 05:56:04 A man went to the dentist
The man receives his test results from the dentist, the man looks down, visibly upset. the dentist asks: "Is everything okay, sir?" the man looks up, sighs, and says "the tooth hurts"

Submitted by samsaver3

@DadJokesCompilation Aprire / Come

2020-06-28 05:56:03 Why are goats considered an advanced species?
They're always living on the bleating edge.

Submitted by sid8tive

@DadJokesCompilation Aprire / Come

2020-06-28 05:56:02 A daughter asked her father, "Why are they called shoes?"
The father said it was a very old story about two inventors named Johnson and Hues. One day Hues was working feverishly on his latest project and talking to himself out loud. Unfortunately for Johnson, his project was not going well and Hues' constant chatter was getting on his last nerve. Suddenly, Hues lept from his chair in excitement and said "I finally did it!" "I finally invented a protective layer of apparel to be worn on the feet!" Johnson was a timid man that never attempted to stifle Hues' talking, but he was about to snap. At last, Hues cried out one last time to himself "...but what shall I call them?", to which Johnson finally retorted, "SSSSHHHH, Hues!"

Submitted by Arkangel_Ash

@DadJokesCompilation Aprire / Come

2020-06-28 05:56:01 A chicken pie in Jamaica costs £2.00. A chicken pie in Trinidad costs £2.14. A chicken pie in St Kitts costs £2.09.
These are the pie rates of the Caribbean.

Submitted by eruwotm8

@DadJokesCompilation Aprire / Come

2020-06-28 05:26:11 Why are there no cars in Minecraft?
Because the streets are blocked off.

Submitted by BlankPhotos

@DadJokesCompilation Aprire / Come

2020-06-28 05:26:10 12 year old daughter singing her revised version of “Creep” by Radiohead...
“I’m a creek. I’m a riverrrrrrrr.”

Submitted by cahalenta

@DadJokesCompilation Aprire / Come

2020-06-28 05:26:09 Future dad joke
Kiddo: Geez whiz dad, we didn't get any snow at all this year!Papa: Yeah, it never used to be like this back in the colden days...Everyone: sigh

Submitted by ohshitsherlock

@DadJokesCompilation Aprire / Come

2020-06-28 05:26:09 It's my 1-year Reddit anniversary
Getting karma should be easy as cake

Submitted by Volumed_Coyote_60

@DadJokesCompilation Aprire / Come

2020-06-28 05:26:08 A trillion neutrinos walk into a bar
One says "ouch"

Submitted by Alaskan_Lost

@DadJokesCompilation Aprire / Come